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Nobody Explained This Part To Me: The Phases of a Woman

Holy shit! This shit is for real. You're good, then you're sweating balls.  I’m talking sweat equivalent to that produced in a small relay race on a hot Summer day. Ooohhh and the mood swings…. The mood swings are pretty gnarly too. It’s the type of irritability and anger that will have you ready to rip throats out. I’m talking about that Patrick Swayze in Roadhouse, two finger throat removal action. Then, guess what happens?  Within the same 30 minutes, full busting tears over the latest Humane Society commercial. The sight of those poor, abused animals rips my heart out. I can’ t take it. I'm a blubbering mess.

Fuck, I’m exhausted. My energy levels are fuckin awesome!...Sike. I used to have the energy of a gazelle. I was the Energizer Bunny incarnate and now to this, ‘I need to take a nap’ version of myself. I’m good and then all of a sudden the energy is drawn out of my body like a syringe siphoning blood out of a vein. It’s so shifty. There is no pattern. There is no predictability. There is also no remedy when the wave hits. So fun.

Wanna talk libido? Let’s talk libido. I’m a fuckin lioness. I like to fuck and I am good at it. I rolled wet and ready all day err day. A fuckin champion in between the sheets. The shift in this department is one of the hardest for me. I don’t wanna look at a dick. I don’t want to suck a dick. I don’t want to touch a dick. I can’t believe I’m writing the words. Ms. Freak - A - Leak herself is now the ‘I’ll rip the dick off if you get near me’ lady. It’s a 180. I’m hoping it passes because I miss the libido of my younger version. It’s hard work to push back my body's hormone crazed anti-dick feelings and touch base with my lioness. Gloves on.

Anxiety and Depression can also be a mother fucker. It’s a real battle. The mood suffers tremendously. The brain is restless. Sometimes it’s in a loop, battling self created and imaginary scenarios. Other times, it's perseverating and focused on the miniscule details of your day or imaginary self-induced shortcomings of your life. Try and take a nap. Haha! The eyes will close but the brain is solving problems that will be next week's issues. Mood can get low. Low enough to make mention of. Self awareness is your best friend. 

Figured it out yet? I’m talking about the cycle of a woman. The experience we will all partake in. There's no escaping it. It’s coming… and I wish I would have been more knowledgeable because I would have better prepared. Perimenopause sucks. I'm assuming menopause will probably suck too and at this point I'm trying to educate myself on how to alleviate symptoms and feel better. I went to the doc and mentioned some symptoms and he said it's your age and did nothing. Is this how it is? Is the expectation for women at this phase of the game to be dismissed and have symptoms minimized by the big MD? I was so discouraged at his response, I didn't advocate for myself or make any further mention of it. Instead, I looked to my friends and family that have gone through the fire for advice and any remedy that assisted them. 

My friend just posted on FB the other day and legitimately asked what other women's experiences have been and made an awesome effort to start a discussion with her friend group. She made mention of her symptoms and her feelings in regards to this phase of our womanhood. You know what I was most surprised about? I was surprised that so many of us were dealing with the same shit. Why don’t we talk about it? There are so many women suffering silently and it sucks. 

After reading her post, It motivated me to talk about it. Some women may roll through this phase unscathed. I am not one of those women. As women, we need to make every effort to normalize this phase of our womanhood. I want to learn how to manage and the best remedies. I also want to open this space up for advice and discussions. I feel embarrassed to share the grittiness of it. This is a transition that I have yet to familiarize myself with. It’s new and many of the feelings, so far, have been undesirable. It’s like watching the petals fall off the flower in Beauty and the Beast. Fuccccckkk Nooooo. Freeze the time.

So, let's talk about it. Let’s embrace each other. Let’s support each other. Let’s straighten each other's crown. Let’s learn how to navigate this new area in a safe and healthy manner together. This is the starting point. I’ve been doing my share of research and invested in some supplements. I def have to make some lifestyle changes but I’m being proactive. You can too. You do not need to suffer silently. Take control. Let’s grab the reins together and make perimenopause/ menopause our bitch. 

As you  go on your mission consider checking out our Menage A Moi Experience ( to start your journey into self-care and if you are struggling harder than what you can tolerate, please reach out for help. You do not need to struggle silently. You have allies and all you have to do is reach out. Also, please remember how beautiful you are. You are a perfectly imperfect creation and you deserve all the goodness of the universe. Stay positive and vibe high my friends.

Raw Thoughts With Grace 

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